You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I just gift wrapped bread.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize