I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
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