do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
