how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
