but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
