i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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