Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
