I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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