I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
