oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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