yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
