Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
