spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
