I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Randomize
