It's like a parade of train wrecks.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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