Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
