I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
