I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Someone shattered a urinal.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
