i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
