Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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