Already got asked if we're dating
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
