just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
