i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
