I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize