something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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