he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize