just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I am one with the molecules
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
