Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize