8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i wish my penis had a tongue
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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