This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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