Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize