So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
