I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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