i don't like sucking hair
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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