Too much gin, very little bucket
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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