I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Buhtt sex?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
