Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
