READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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