After last night, I could never be a politician.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize