Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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