it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
