you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize