Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
