And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
