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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Randomize
