I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
