so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
