come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
