She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
