Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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